Body pressure is, certianly in my case, the biggest and most recurring fear of my life. And it is a fear - it's scary how much I think about it in a day, let alone my whole life and it's equally chilling watching the way it affects my behaviour and how I react to it. I obsess over food, I am a self-proclaimed binger and i'm certain I have a problem with comfort eating and can never have a guilt-free moment. It's all made worse by the naturally skinny girls who were at my school who could afford to shovel junk food due to their perfect metabolisms - and good on them: may they reproduce and create the next generation of kids who don't have to be body concious. Sadly, i'm not like that. Lots of people aren't.
Something i try and think about is why skinny people don't obsess over food and I think it's because they have more to occupy themselves with. This is partly why I've started a blog, as a way of giving me something to do to distract me from thinking about food and ultimately eating. I find it hard to have nice food in the house and not eat it however when i'm doing something (art, reading etc) my whole conscience can be poured into that activity.
I think of lots of my friends who are overweight or chubby and I know that I never hate on them for eating and I don't judge them for neglecting exercise and I have to tell myself that they would only think the same about me. The battle against my bad eating habits continues and we all continue to be told that skinny is pretty and anything else is failure.
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